The Vending Machine

Out pops an Academic Dismissal sheet



Insert Really good excuse


Ps machine in now accepting I.O.U.s

Nice Trey's truck pops out.

Insert Atrey's Ice Climbers.

You get an ice turd.

Insert I.O.U

The machine slaps you for being pour.

Insert 5 pesos.

Chalupas!

Inserts a bouncy ball

Geoffery the giraffe from toys r us sticks his head out and says " low low prices! we..." and then someone decapitates him with a machete.

insert walmart push up bra.

Out pops Marge, the wal-mart greeter!

Inserts 2 quarters.

machine pukes

insert 10k gp

The Sword of 1000 Truths

Insert a Gears of War 2 disk.

WHOA!! COLE TRAIN BABY!!

Inserts a quarter with a string on it

Machine cuts string before you can pull and says "HAH BITCH!"

Inserts Taco Bell reciept.

The machine has a case of explosive diarrhea.

Insert a bucket of Lysol.

A pulsating tumor falls out.

Insert a dog collar.

Barking and whining emit from the machine before it spits out a wiener dog.

Insert dangle scales.

out comes dangle cookies. WTF I HAVENO CLUE WTF THOSE ARE.

Inserts a Magnum Flashlight

out comes samus chargin' her lazors!

insert Austin

Thirty years pass as it works out creepy pedophile Austin, the Michael Jackson wanna be.

Insert furrie porno pictures.

Out pops Sek



Inserts doggy's glasses

*Watches the vending machine walk into a wall*. -Hmm, I really am blind as fuck.

Inserts Jeff's $5 bill.

Dogy comes out losing a money match.

Insert food stamps.

Hey, we gotta have some currency to put Barack on!

Inserts a blank cd.

Machine spits back out with every lame boy band song ever formulated by the record companies.

Insert baseball bat. *most of the time I just look around me and find the most eye catching thing*

machine spits out a George Bush clone

insert 3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419716939937510 pies

The machine spits out a stick of dynamite, the fuse lit.

Insert American Indian dream catcher.

out comes a ball of yarn and some beads.

Inserts a used copy of the 2003 almanac